My Body is My Body, and is My Body Too.

“I just want a bigger booty.”

Every day I scroll through my Twitter and Instagram timelines, ogling at the beautifully thick, round booties that I come across. The Beyoncé’s and the Serena Williams’ and Lala Anthony’s of the world. Don’t act like you don’t do it too! We all do it! I faithfully watch Dr. Miami’s snapchat every day, always skipping through everything except for the Brazilian Butt Lifts, or BBLs if you’re familiar with his work (honestly, who isn’t familiar). I watch in awe as he collects fat from one area of a body to transfer to the butt, making everybooty round and plump. A long time ago I jokingly decided that I’d just go to Dr. Miami to get a BBL and get the booty I’ve always dreamed of.

While I’m making these plans to get thicccc and bootylicious (word to Destiny’s Child), Kendrick Lamar releases his 4th studio album DAMN. and the hit HUMBLE. emerges. With this emergence.. the controversial lines that set social media ablaze lit up my life:

“I’m so fuckin’ sick and tired of the Photoshop

….

Show me somethin’ natural like ass with some stretch marks”

So to me, Kdot’s message was meant to be harmless, and that we all just need to embrace our natural beauty as black people. That’s it that’s all. Nothing more, nothing less. Anyways, it’s been a few months since HUMBLE. hit the streets, and I’ve had time to think about this and let it marinate. My question is, why can’t we, as black women, do whatever it is we want with our bodies without getting criticized for it? While I respect and admire Kdot for his empowering of natural black beauty, I just feel like black women are always getting fussed at for something we’re doing. Changing our hair, wearing makeup, doing this or doing that. But when it’s not us doing whatever, it’s okay. It’s normal.

Now I get that we’re honestly the standard of beauty, because then we wouldn’t have Kim Kardashian’s ass or Kylie Jenner’s lips or Marc Jacobs sporting them ugly ass, musty looking attempt of locs down his runway, hell we wouldn’t even have Dr. Miami and his BBLs that I want so much! We wouldn’t have the annoying ass phrase of “_____ girls are evolving!” when it’s something even remotely close to a characteristic that black women naturally have. But that doesn’t mean we don’t have a right to want something else for ourselves. It’s irritating. I got my very first sew-in for this pageant I was in earlier this year, and the hardest part about that entire experience was trying to convince my dad that it wasn’t a bad thing for me to get. It’s my hair, why can’t I do whatever I want to it without all this extra-ness?!?

All the time I see black women getting called out on not having natural physical features, like augmented breasts, overly snatchedT waists, or butt implants. I honestly don’t think it’s fair. Why is it always us? So Sara can get a boob job, Jessica can get a tummy tuck, & Parker can get butt implants? But my girl Onika got dragged because her booty couldn’t move. My friend Kristal put my thoughts into words, and it spoke volumes to me. She said that this society has normalized things that shouldn’t have ever been normalized, as well as set a standard for women in general. And society feels black women will never live up to that standard, so when they see us going above and beyond where they thought we should be, it’s a problem or it’s not appropriate. When in reality? We women create and set our own standards that we should hold our selves to. Not society. Because not everyone is the same.

And if we want to get these fake assets or enhancements that make us “look” the same? First of all, black women are too diverse & complex to ever look the same. That’s what makes black women beautiful. We come in so many different shapes, sizes color, styles, we’re like the 8th Wonder of the world. It’s time to reclaim our beauty and no longer let the masses dictate us and have a say in what we do to our bodies. Especially for ourselves. Secondly? Let me do what I want. I’m grown, I’m healthy, and I am in charge of my body. Most importantly, I’m in charge of my life.

 

 

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